Where is the hickey?
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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