Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When did we convert life to cartoon?
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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