I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
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