its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
