if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Randomize