I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
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