i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Randomize
