I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Randomize
