you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Randomize
