I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
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