I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Randomize
