Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
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his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
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New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
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