hell yes lets make some ravioli
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize
