Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
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