Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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