Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize