Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
I just found a bag of teeth...
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
