Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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