they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
