Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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