I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Dude, I just woke up on the floor of some random chick's floor with puke in my hair and a posted note on my forehead that said "It's over." Dude I wasn't even aware I was in a relationship...
Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Randomize