there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Randomize
