oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
I'm passing your future prison.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Randomize
