Sponge bath it is.
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Randomize
