He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Randomize
