Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
Randomize
