is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
