I need help removing her.
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Randomize
