I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
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