just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
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