question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
