I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Randomize
