it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Randomize
