Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
where are you?
Hypothermia
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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