is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
