oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
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