In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
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