"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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