That's intense
M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
