Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
