chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
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