I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
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