I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
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