I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
I want to be your penis for a week.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
I'm really busy with my period
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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