Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
