I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Randomize