i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
Just puked most of my soul out..
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
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