you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
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