Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
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