I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Randomize
