sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
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