Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
You need Xanax blowdarts
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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